Relationships, Expectations & Fluidity
- Posted by: Keshia Martin
- Category: Uncategorized
I love having conversations with friends, especially ones that I connect with and can vibe with. We got into a discussion on relationships and expectation. Basically, having this expectation can create problems, sometimes major in a relationship.
One point that he brought to me was the 50/50, levels of duality that most hope to attain with another. More importantly, how this is wrong and sets a lot of relationships up for failure. I had to think on that but as we spoke further it made sense. But instead that we should not look for 50/50, for that is expecting a leveled that is unrealistic through a lifetime with one. But to find one where the synchronicity works between the two of you. So for fluidity.
As we know, life will give you hurdles, good times, obstacles, joy, sickness, unexpected changes and more. With this, we each have our levels that we will be able to perform at given the circumstances. Some may be 90%. Other times, you may have had enough and you may be at 30%, hell maybe even 20% or 10%!
With a partnership, the relationship should be fluid. One where, when you are not at your best, one can help make up that difference. At the same level, to have it naturally in you to want to be there for the person when they are not at their best. Filling in the blanks on the other’s weakness, at that time to make it whole.
Here is where the marriage and unity comes into play, where the two halves become one whole. So in essence one may be at 60 today, 30 in the future and back 70 later. With fluidity, the other is the opposite amount, completing the partnership. So, 40 today, 70 in the future and back to 30. Now its not healthy if one is always or the majority of time at 30 and the other is at 70. No, it must be fluid, an ease of exchange.
So you see, a fluid body of motion between two people creating ripples through time together. The challenge right now, is that many are looking for someone to just do this for them. Not really developing themselves enough to be this fluid part of motion with another. But in essence, looking for what someone can do for them.
This dogma sets the levels of expectation and creates the disruption we see now through high divorce rates, murder suicides, love triangles and more. The reason being is, many are running the cart backwards. Looking for love the wrong way. Never putting both feet and really trying to get to know the other person flaws and all.
Here’s the thing, one must truly break the barriers within themselves first. This includes: fear, hurt, disappointment, unforgiveness, anger, anxiety and more. Truly breaking past what is within you. For we attract what we reflect out.
Doing this, you attract the right kind of person into your life. One that mirrors you in a way that compliments your life. From here, this is where you can truly experience fluidity and free exchange of love, help and support between you and another.
At this point, one won’t look for 50/50, for they will understand and know each other from removing the unwanted, should have been dropped emotions and feelings to things of the past. You will know when you meet someone like this, for the conversations will flow. Things of the past are overcome and the strength in experiences will show through confidence.
So if are experiencing challenges with meeting someone or in a current relationship, do as I always say and look within. Also, check yourself first and see what things you are not doing for the other person. Friendship is like a bank, you can only take out what you put in. And even a loan has a payback. Secondly, what are you allowing that is not conducive to you? Making you stress, upset or more.
From here, you will know the answer on what to do to fix your situation.