Keshia Martin

Ever ready to throw in the towel or call it quits on something that you have been working on?  Or perhaps just walk away from a situation.  Its a development of putting your all in, using much needed energy to hit a wall.  Know the feeling?

Well, I’ve known it all too well. The people pleasing, the self-sabotage, the wondering what would people say if?….. I’m sure you get the picture. See for women, it’s natural for us to nurture, think ahead and forecast what may be possible in hopes for us to be better prepared. But what it does really stop us from is, the great what if’s and possible journeys that await us.

Here is where I had my Whaalah moment!  Thinking of conversations that I’ve had with clients, friends, family there are 5 common threads that exist that blocks us.

Even more prevalent, this can be in any aspect of your life.  Here are the obstacles that I found to stop us from leaving our problems:

1.  Focus On The Obstacle

Many times, the focus is on the obstacle.  See its like a self-inflicted wound where we continue on a cycle of just seeing the obstacle.   Focusing on the obstacle allows creativity but in the wrong direction.  It focuses on just the one thing and all though we are taking action (you know finding a more creative way to solve this), you end up in the same lesson just in a different scenario.

2. Create Limitations

Self-limiting belief is a big killer of dreams. It creates a mental space of focusing in a very limited way and not seeing other options.  As a result, we operate from a place of self-sabotage.  Fear of moving in a direction due to worry from moving there in the past.    Seeing the limit we find more reasons, why now is not the right time, how going here may create problems and more worrying than believing.

3.  Being Married To The Problem

Ever have that friend, that no matter the solution you give, they go back to the issue?  Or perhaps you have been there?  Have you noticed the focus goes back to points 1 and 2?  This happens because the pain has become more comfortable to deal with than a new possible outcome.  As a result, we become invested in all parts.  This investment is marriage. When we are married to the problem, we are connected emotionally, physically (stress) and mentally. These attachments is just like a marriage.  And if you ever been through a divorce where you were connected in all these aspects, I’m sure you thought that death may have been easier.  The thing is, every time you decide to leave in one aspect the other ones pulls you in.  It’s like breaking up with social media.  It’s no longer just one time.

4.  Find Someone To Blame

This can be a person or just the situation.  Most often times there needs to be a blame.  In our minds, the reason replay and analyze is so we can not have this challenge again.  In theory, this makes sense if the stop was really hard to go through.  But in reality, what it does is create analysis paralysis.    So rewinding, playing back moments turns to overthinking and another way of stopping your success.  It can also create unforgiveness, which in itself creates a whole other set of issues.

5. Losing Value In What You Do

This can be a big one.  But if you have had a hobby that you enjoy doing and no longer, then you are in this boat as well.  When we lose this, more doubt is present and keeps us from believing in what is outside of our vision.  The value we bring is lost to those that are in a space to receives and resignation to other fun aspects of our life diminishes.

These things are all life suckers and really keep you paralyzed from achieving the love, success, career or family that you want.  But what if there was a way to break past this?

More importantly, what is the ROI on not having these things stop you? Hmmm…let’s think

• Going out feeling like you look good
• Real conversations, that are actually fun
• Better quality time with Kids
• The Job you want
• better relations
• Actual time out for you

Yes! these are all things that happen when your mind is freed up.  You get to embrace the real you that most likely you have forgotten or can’t believe its possible again.

But I got you.  Just know there is a way. Embrace by divorcing the problem to free your mind and change your life.  Once I did this, overthinking went away and staying present became easier.  The clarity received from pulling those weeds out, gave me real room for growth.

And I know its possible for you!  until next time……

xoxo

PS.  I have ways to help you get out of your own way.

1.  Join My Universal Love Group – It’s a group where others that are dealing with similar issues get to connect too.

2.  Grab the Solution on Getting Rid of these Blocks.   I’ll go right for the middle and teach you how to      DIVORCE What’s Stopping you…we’ll even get you down to do it in 15 Min.  Click here for details.

3. Do you feel you are sacrificing yourself more than you need to and feel there is a deeper issue?  That no matter what, you feel not good enough?  I know how I can help you. Book a free call.